Friday, January 16, 2009


Grabbing a quick coffee.
Don't sit too close!
I have a cold...yes, it's been going around the nation and finally hit me. How silly to have thought I may possibly escape all other fellow's citizen's fate. :P
Yes, I have been gone a bit, but that is due to I was busy tending to my children who had it before me.
Excuse me as I grab a tissue....

I have a quick thought to share...something that I have been thinking about...

We had a pastor leave our parish.
He is fantastic and will be sorely missed.

In fact, he grew up in that very Catholic school and parish!
Neat, huh?
To have attended as a kid and grow up to be the pastor?!

Anyhow, he was there a long time.
He thought he would retire there.
They were his family.
He was quite attached.

That is what I have been pondering...
attachments we have.

As he spoke to address the Mass attendees,
he was really choked up.
He did not expect this curve ball this late in life.
He was going to have to be going out "into the deep"....
into strange lands...
foreign territory....
well, not so foreign as the new parish is within an hour's drive...
but "NEW" "Different" "Unknown".

(At least, a big comfort that I see in being a Catholic is the routine is the same regardless of where you go....per it's not like something completely utterly unknown.)

But, I did see a deep attachment.

It got me thinking about attachment.

I moved a lot my whole life long....
all 29 years. (hahahaaha Okay, more than 29....)

I never had the chance to form big attachments to places
because I was used to having to "detach".

So, I felt his pain because he seemingly lived the opposite:
he lived attached to one place and one people...
even one building.

That had to hurt to be told "you're out in 2 weeks." the same time...
I was thinking:
Father, this is a perfect time to teach the lesson
"Bloom where you are planted."

(Usually the one who says that to the one who is being "planted" is not really appreciated by the one being "planted"...the one being planted usually is thinking:
"Why don't you just go and ....BLOOM!" :P )
That's just because it is difficult and someone going through something difficult
does want to hear short flippant sounding answers.

(Yes, I know. I have been there. I had to do the big fake smile and say, "Thanks!"
Well, the folks speaking little upbeat quips to you DO mean that is appreciated.)

But, I think I was shocked at how hard this separation hit Father.
I felt his pain and so did every person sitting there in the pews.

It was sweet to see his love for everyone...
but it was a little surprising also to see the deep attachement.
Sure, he is human.
We all are.
But, especially as Christians, we need to show our sadness at our detachments with a mixture of:
God's Will be done!
And, I am not alone: God is with me always.
In fact, He resides in me!

I guess I was hoping he'd use the opportunity to teach us a little about that.
Be an example.
"Bloom where you are planted"

They say all healthy potted plants need repotting every now and then to stay healthy.
Maybe God knows this ;).

I was hoping it would be a teaching opportunity about
how everyone is human and forms attachments,
even him, yea, even a priest, but we have to learn
to let go and always keep our one main attachement:
God's Will.
Because, in life, God should be our first love, our first home, our only home, our destination, our eternity, our eternal now, our present moment, our hope, our joy, our contentment, our source, our buddy/friend, our companion, our brother, our Father, our family, our constant....etc.

God is one thing that never changes.
He is always the same.
He never leaves us.
He gave thought to us, He bore us unto life, He is with us in life, He grasps us at death and welcomes us home.
Everything else is a far, albeit lovely in many instances, second.

I guess that was what I was hoping our Pastor would show.
This is definitely difficult.
I definitely will miss you.
I love you.
You were such a big part of my life.
It will be hard to release fact, I won't...I'll keep you in my heart always.
I am sad.
I don't want to say goodbye.
I am scared to move on.
I don't know what my future holds.
I don't know if my next parish will be my I go there without a net of security.
I don't know where I will wind up.
I may form new attachements and if I let them go as deep,
I'll be very hurt again and I am not sure I can do that.
I am afraid I'll close my heart a little to attachments due to that fear.
I want to do God's Will.
Sometimes, I am sad to find myself wanting to do it only with my feet kind of kicking.
I kind of hear a "no!" in my heart.
But, my "Yes! Thy Will be done." is louder and stronger than my no.
I don't like to admit I sometimes feel that "no."
You can't trust "feelings" as a way to make sound moral decisions.

I guess....
I was hoping he'd be the superman and say:
"This is so sad, but I am so in love with God and doing His will and serving Him,
that it's my joy to announce that I am moving to a new parish...."

I was one who was told by a priest friend
Fr Peter Mary Rookey OSM
"Bloom where you are planted.
Let your very special light shine."
And, I thought:
But, how do I bloom? What does bloom mean in it's fullness?
I wonder if he realizes how hard it is to be separated
from every relative you have...
maybe he doesn't and maybe he's just trying to comfort me.
Maybe he does and is speaking from experience and wisdom.
(I decided it was the latter!)
I always held in my heart all these years of moves...
every child of mine was born in a different state....
always moving....
"Bloom where you are planted!"
Held it in my heart not as a flippant silly saying,
but as something deep to contemplate/meditate on.

Over the years I come to see what he meant/means.
There even leaves more for me to contemplate in that phrase.

But one thing I came out thinking,
after the Pastors sad departure speech,
instead of my first initial thoughts of:
"Why is he SO sad? You think he lost his entire world. He is God's priest by His own choice. He is here to go where God plants him..."...
I felt this deep compassion for him,
a man who is following his calling ....
who is doing God's will (and wonderfully so might I add)
a man who has a big heart and who opened it and had the courage to LOVE his people...
I came out with this:
Priests are human, too.

I left with the conviction that we need to PRAY for our priests way more than we do.

Coffee break is over and I need to get back to bed and hopefully get better soon.

Our Lady, Mother of the Clergy, pray for them :)

1 comment:

umblepie said...

Nice post, thanks.