Confession

Busy catching up after so long being "down" with the flu.
(I am still sniffling and have a teeny left over that I'll keep an eye on.)

Not in full swing, but, while sitting inside on this cold dark day
I made up this Confession blog on blogger.
Feel free to check it out:
Get To Confession.

I'll add more when I can, but that was a LOT for me today...phew! ;P
I get tired easily still.

If you have any nice Confession links to sites, podcasts, or interviews, and wish to share them with others, let me know!
E-mail me and I'll add them.

Must get to bed. It's been a long day.

Today is the first day my chest is not hurting badly (I was going to rush to the doctor today).
I had a dream last night that I was in a Church building (not the chapel part, but just the big building part). I asked someone where the Adoration chapel was. They told me "First right after you enter the front door." I was like "hmmmm" and snuck away to see it! ;)
Well, low-and-behold, I didn't find any adoration chapel, but I did come across this HUGE HUGE statue of Mary, Our Lady of Grace! It was like the statue of libery.
There was this big bed (?) below it and I layed down to gaze up and contemplate it.
It was made of medal.
I noticed it move then..and quickly shut my eyes as if I were asleep...but I peeked!
I saw Mary take an angel that looked like 2 feet tall and in a white gown and she tenderly was straightening out the wrinkles of the gown and stuff...very sweetly.
When she was done, she let the little angel "go"...and went back to a statue!
I then opened my eyes as if I didn't see it, but I was wondering about it.
That's when I woke up.

You know, sometimes we have these funny dreams and don't know what to make of them (and perhaps nothing!). But, I always enjoy a dream where I see Mary :)) Don't you?!

Anyhow, have a good night.
We are expecting an ice storm in Dallas tonight.
I bet there will be no school tomorrow! Oh happy day! ;P

(PS: Sorry I didn't get the opportunity to change my music on here yet!)

Rosary Stars: the DVD!

I thought you all might like to know that Eduard Verastegui, the star

in Bella, is producing a DVD: "Rosary Stars: Praying the Gospel".

Family Theater Productions' latest project is due to be released in

February 2009. The film will feature contemporary celebrities and

champions sharing their inspirational reflections on how they live and

pray the Rosary every day. Copy and paste the link below to see video

trailer. It is awesome!!! This is not meant to promote anything. It

is just another means of providing inspiration for those of us who

need to be reminded to do as Our Mother asks.



http://www.familytheater.org/tv_film-media_clip.html?pageFormat=popup&mediaClip=rosarystarstrailer.flv

Been Sick

Been sick with the flu and in bed for over a week.
Hope to be back online next week! God bless.
Prayers for life 1-22.
Kelly

Blooming

Grabbing a quick coffee.
Don't sit too close!
I have a cold...yes, it's been going around the nation and finally hit me. How silly to have thought I may possibly escape all other fellow's citizen's fate. :P
Yes, I have been gone a bit, but that is due to I was busy tending to my children who had it before me.
Excuse me as I grab a tissue....

I have a quick thought to share...something that I have been thinking about...

We had a pastor leave our parish.
He is fantastic and will be sorely missed.

In fact, he grew up in that very Catholic school and parish!
Neat, huh?
To have attended as a kid and grow up to be the pastor?!

Anyhow, he was there a long time.
He thought he would retire there.
They were his family.
He was quite attached.

That is what I have been pondering...
attachments we have.

As he spoke to address the Mass attendees,
he was really choked up.
He did not expect this curve ball this late in life.
He was going to have to be going out "into the deep"....
into strange lands...
foreign territory....
well, not so foreign as the new parish is within an hour's drive...
but "NEW" "Different" "Unknown".

(At least, a big comfort that I see in being a Catholic is the routine is the same regardless of where you go....per se....so it's not like something completely utterly unknown.)

But, I did see a deep attachment.

It got me thinking about attachment.

I moved a lot my whole life long....
all 29 years. (hahahaaha Okay, okay..so more than 29....)

I never had the chance to form big attachments to places
because I was used to having to "detach".

So, I felt his pain because he seemingly lived the opposite:
he lived attached to one place and one people...
even one building.

That had to hurt to be told "you're out in 2 weeks."

But...at the same time...
I was thinking:
Father, this is a perfect time to teach the lesson
"Bloom where you are planted."

(Usually the one who says that to the one who is being "planted" is not really appreciated by the one being "planted"...the one being planted usually is thinking:
"Why don't you just go and ....BLOOM!" :P )
That's just because it is difficult and someone going through something difficult
does want to hear short flippant sounding answers.

(Yes, I know. I have been there. I had to do the big fake smile and say, "Thanks!"
Well, the folks speaking little upbeat quips to you DO mean well...so that is appreciated.)

But, I think I was shocked at how hard this separation hit Father.
I felt his pain and so did every person sitting there in the pews.

It was sweet to see his love for everyone...
but it was a little surprising also to see the deep attachement.
Sure, he is human.
We all are.
But, especially as Christians, we need to show our sadness at our detachments with a mixture of:
God's Will be done!
Fiat!
And, I am not alone: God is with me always.
In fact, He resides in me!

I guess I was hoping he'd use the opportunity to teach us a little about that.
Be an example.
"Bloom where you are planted"

They say all healthy potted plants need repotting every now and then to stay healthy.
Maybe God knows this ;).

I was hoping it would be a teaching opportunity about
how everyone is human and forms attachments,
even him, yea, even a priest, but we have to learn
to let go and always keep our one main attachement:
God.
God's Will.
Because, in life, God should be our first love, our first home, our only home, our destination, our eternity, our eternal now, our present moment, our hope, our joy, our contentment, our source, our buddy/friend, our companion, our brother, our Father, our family, our constant....etc.

God is one thing that never changes.
He is always the same.
He never leaves us.
He gave thought to us, He bore us unto life, He is with us in life, He grasps us at death and welcomes us home.
Everything else is a far, albeit lovely in many instances, second.

I guess that was what I was hoping our Pastor would show.
This is definitely difficult.
I definitely will miss you.
I love you.
You were such a big part of my life.
It will be hard to release you...in fact, I won't...I'll keep you in my heart always.
I am sad.
I don't want to say goodbye.
I am scared to move on.
I don't know what my future holds.
I don't know if my next parish will be my last...so I go there without a net of security.
I don't know where I will wind up.
I may form new attachements and if I let them go as deep,
I'll be very hurt again and I am not sure I can do that.
I am afraid I'll close my heart a little to attachments due to that fear.
I want to do God's Will.
Sometimes, I am sad to find myself wanting to do it only with my feet kind of kicking.
I kind of hear a "no!" in my heart.
But, my "Yes! Thy Will be done." is louder and stronger than my no.
I don't like to admit I sometimes feel that "no."
You can't trust "feelings" as a way to make sound moral decisions.

I guess....
I was hoping he'd be the superman and say:
"This is so sad, but I am so in love with God and doing His will and serving Him,
that it's my joy to announce that I am moving to a new parish...."

Yet,
I was one who was told by a priest friend
Fr Peter Mary Rookey OSM
"Bloom where you are planted.
Let your very special light shine."
And, I thought:
But, how do I bloom? What does bloom mean in it's fullness?
I wonder if he realizes how hard it is to be separated
from every relative you have...
maybe he doesn't and maybe he's just trying to comfort me.
Maybe he does and is speaking from experience and wisdom.
(I decided it was the latter!)
I always held in my heart all these years of moves...
every child of mine was born in a different state....
always moving....
"Bloom where you are planted!"
Held it in my heart not as a flippant silly saying,
but as something deep to contemplate/meditate on.

Over the years I come to see what he meant/means.
There even leaves more for me to contemplate in that phrase.

But one thing I came out thinking,
after the Pastors sad departure speech,
was.....
instead of my first initial thoughts of:
"Why is he SO sad? You think he lost his entire world. He is God's priest by His own choice. He is here to go where God plants him..."...
I felt this deep compassion for him,
a man who is following his calling ....
who is doing God's will (and wonderfully so might I add)
a man who has a big heart and who opened it and had the courage to LOVE his people...
I came out with this:
Priests are human, too.

And,
I left with the conviction that we need to PRAY for our priests way more than we do.

Coffee break is over and I need to get back to bed and hopefully get better soon.

Our Lady, Mother of the Clergy, pray for them :)

Men and Porn: Confessor's Point of View

Time for a quick Cappuccino and quiet...and when I say quick, it's unfortunately quick! (But, that is what makes it all the more sweeter! A stolen peaceful quiet moment, ah, 'tis gold! ;)) Thanks for joining me. I'm rushing this (as it seems to be whenever you have gold, you're in a rush!).

I was given this PDF link on Porn and how addictive it is to men...well, it was discussing Catholic men in particular and it's the view point from the other side of the confessional (I am always curious about that point of view! Curiosity killed the cat, I know...I know.). Not from the side of the man struggling with the addiction or embarrassed to confess it (perhaps it took forever to overcome his fears of confessing it or "how" to confess it and all that that Satan puts into every sinner's mind prior to confessing),but, yes, from the view point of the priest sitting there who is NOT shocked per se at "this" confession penitent speaking, but just 'how many' of this exact same thing he has heard in the short space of 1.5 hours! It's pretty prevalent. (So, if you always wanted to confess this sin, if this is a sin of yours, there's no time like today to get it off your chest finally...release the embarrassment and fears of sounding like the 'weirdo of the parish' LOL...unfortunately, you are not alone.)

This article then goes on to also speak (naturally) of healing (Confession obviously involves forgiveness, grace and healing). It gives suggestions for healing after confession. It gives encouragement to keep on keeping on...when you fall under your cross, don't get discouraged, get up, wipe off the mud, and get back to walking the Walk of the Crucifixion which is our battle life. Battle is tough. You get wounded. But, a real hero and fighter does not give up, not even if he sheds some blood...until victory is declared. I know we'll see a lot of "Purple Hearts" in Heaven! (Just look at our Commander and Chief!) ;)

Anyhow, coffee's getting cold and it's time for tuck-ins, prayers, & stories. But, if you want to read this article or share it, HERE IS THE LINK.

Another good idea is for all of us to keep each other's back: to always pray for the addicted (to whatever!) for their release, their victory! To help them obtain the grace to fight and not get discouraged in battle.

Just think: when we do cross that "finish line" it's a done deal. No more struggle. Just victory and the rewards of victory! Forever, too! That is a very refreshing thought.

Good Night!

Some thoughts over my Cappuccino...

See to it that you're not suddenly saddened by the adversities of this
world, for you don't know the good they bring, being ordained in the
judgments of God for the everlasting joy of the elect.

St. John of the Cross (1542-1591AD) on Afflictions

Mini-Bio: Spanish; Carmelite priest, provincial, reformer, mystical writer, Doctor of the Church

That's sure true. Or, as I read somewhere else: we only see the "messy" side of the tapestry that God is sewing ("sowing") with your life...with your day...with your present moment. We look and think, "Ug." or "What the HECK could He be doing?" "Hmm...wonder if He really knows how to sew." :P
BUT--in reality, every cross-stitcher knows that the back MAY look messy (even some knots showing!) but the front is planned and lovely.
So, the reading went on, always know that God knows how to "sew" (sow) and knows exactly what He is doing and does it perfectly well! Have patience! Trust! (That's the hard part)

So, when you have one of "those days" or weeks...or "times"...
pray, hope, TRUST, and don't worry....
God is excellent at His "tapestries" and is creating something quite beautiful one day.
You'll see it and get a big sheepish grin perhaps and say:
"Oooooh..hehehehe...well, I didn't know..." :D *blush*
And, He'll look at you with a Fatherly twinkle in His eye and smile in his voice and say:
"I know you didn't. That is why I asked you to trust me." :D
"Now, child, did I disappoint you?"
You'll have the blush and big sheepish grin again and say,
"No, Father!" and then that grin will turn into a truly big joyful smile!

Trust.

Seems like the simplest little word.

Who doesn't trust God? If you don't trust Him, who can you trust?
YET....
hahahahaha.

So, let's resolve this year to TRUST more.

Especially when we notice "the knots" and start to feel that sinking feeling! :P